What the (Bleep) is Happening?
I suppose every decade or so since Caesar strode through the Roman Forum some wagging head (whether in a toga or on CNN) has complained about the imminent demise of civilization as we know it.
Well, it’s time to start listening, folks. Pretty soon you may see me walking down Broadway with a sandwich board reading, “The End Is Near.”
Item: A fourth term South Carolina Congressman named Joe Wilson heckles the President of the United States during a speech, shouting “You Lie!” The President had just said that his proposed health care would not apply to illegal immigrants, a claim that the non-partisan Factcheck.org later said was accurate. Mr. Wilson later said “I’m sorry,” although I suspect he probably whispered under his breath “But I’m not.” Personally I’d prefer to see Wilson apologize for his vote in the South Carolina State Senate in 2000 to keep the Confederate flag flying over the capital.
Item: A tennis sensation, Serena Williams, is unfairly penalized for a foot-fault in her semi-final match against Kim Clijsters at the U.S. Open and turns to vent her rage at the hapless line judge who made the incorrect call, threatening to stuff the ball down her throat and uttering a river of obscenities that would make a sailor blush.
Item: A 34-year old father named Jason Chighizola is found guilty of battery after he punches out the coach of the opposing team at a Little League game for eight year olds in Louisiana.
Item: A 19-year old wunderkind, Taylor Swift, steps up to the microphone to receive her Best Female Video award when a a rapper named Kanye West grabs the microphone and says, in essence, “Beyonce’s video was better!”
Item: President Obama appears at a town hall meeting in Portsmouth, NH, and a man named William Kostric shows up with a gun strapped to his leg and a sign in his hand reading: "It Is Time To Water The Tree Of Liberty.”
The term “civilization” has a few meanings. The term can refer to a high level of cultural and technological development. By that measure, North Korea would probably rate a high score on the Civilimeter: Think of the sublime cultural achievement of synchronized thousands doing calisthenics, not to mention nuclear capped missiles. Mr. Kostric would also get a high rating: After all, his sign in New Hampshire quoted Thomas Jefferson and his weapon was a 9mm Smith & Wesson, a manufacturer that according to its web site prides itself on “combining old-world hand-craftsmanship with modern technology.” Sounds civilized to me.
There’s another meaning for the term “civilization.” According to Merriam-Webster, it can refer to a “refinement of thought, manners or taste.”
Well, I trust Joe Wilson eats with a fork and Kanye West is polite to his elders. Surely Serena does not eat her peas with a knife and Jason Chighizola opens the door for his wife. I suppose that makes them all civilized.
But do these examples of boorish, tasteless, irreverent, insipid behavior reflect the refinement that we are capable of? I don’t think so.
I don’t expect a Boy Scout to swoop down on every old lady who approaches a street crossing. Or male drivers to rush around to the passenger side to open the door for their lady friends. Or guys at the Sports Bar to hold their pinkies daintily in the air as they tip one back during the Super Bowl.
But wouldn’t it be nice to see a return to some modest level of manners and good taste? Are concepts like decency, honesty, fair play history? Or have they taken a brief holiday?
When I think of the rules of civility I am reminded of my favorite golf player, one of the all time greats, Bobby Jones. At the 1925 US Open, Jones stepped into the grass with his iron and set up to hit a ball. The club touched the grass and the ball moved. Nobody saw it. Jones looked up and called a two-stroke penalty on himself. When someone praised Jones for his honesty, he replied, “You may as well praise a man for not robbing a bank.”
More recently, Ian Woosnam, a Welsh golfer, did something similar. Playing in the last round of the British Open in 2001, Woosnam called a two-stroke penalty on himself when his inexperienced caddy announced to him that he was carrying an extra driver in his bag. The rules of Golf are clear: A player may carry a maximum of 14 clubs in his bag. Woosnam’s caddy was carrying 15. The gaffe – which nobody would have known about it if Woonam hadn’t raised his hand -- cost him $300,000 in prize money.
Mahatma Gandhi wrote that “Civility and humility are expressions of the spirit of non-violence while incivility and insolence indicates the spirit of violence…[P]oliteness disarms anger and hatred, incivility increases hostility.”
In other words, civility is not only the right thing to do, it is in our own best interests. It sets a tone, keeps the peace, disarms the angry, quells the rage, calms the mind.
Think about it.

